Why Emotions Can Still Take Over Even When You Understand Them

Hello everyone,

I’ve been thinking a lot about how emotional reactions actually show up in daily life. Most of the time, they don’t arrive with a warning. They come in the middle of ordinary moments—a message, a conversation, a feeling of pressure—and suddenly everything inside feels louder and more urgent.

Someone recently described a moment like that: the day had been moving along fine, and then one small interaction tipped the balance. Nothing dramatic happened, but internally there was a sharp shift. The pull to do something—anything—to make the feeling stop showed up fast. That moment wasn’t about insight or effort. It was about emotional activation in the body.

From a nervous system perspective, this makes sense. When emotional intensity rises, the body moves into a state of readiness. Stress chemistry increases, attention narrows, and the brain looks for relief. This is where urges often form—not as decisions, but as learned responses to internal pressure. Over time, those responses become familiar because they’ve worked before, even briefly.

The skill that changes this pattern is emotional regulation. Regulation is the ability to stay present while intensity is happening—remaining with experience long enough for the body to move through it rather than react immediately. The video linked below walks through how this works and why it matters.

🎥 Watch the Emotional Regulation video here:

There’s also a guided meditation that supports this practice directly. The meditation focuses on returning attention to the breath, noticing wandering, and staying present when urges or pressure arise.

🧘 Watch the Awareness & Regulation meditation here:

This isn’t about doing anything perfectly. It’s about practicing the moment where regulation happens—again and again—so the nervous system has a chance to learn something new through experience.

Thank you for being here and for continuing to engage with this work.

Warmly,

Sheila

ARC Director, Certified FARA